Light and Easy

I have been enjoying the light traffic and the easy workload for the last two weeks. The traffic started to ease off with the start of the end-of-year school holiday. The peak is the last two weeks -- especially when the expatriates go home for two weeks, the locals take extra days off for celebrations, and the rest just use up their remaining annual leaves.

The road is a lot clearer than normal. I take about half an hour to arrive at work. That is half of the normal time.
The office is half empty: shorter queue at the cafe, shorter wait at the elevators, calmer and quieter surau.
The helpdesk is not busy at all. I get only a few tasks this whole week. And I get to take my time completing them.
A lot less pressure.. not that it is so much demanding in the first place anyway.

YEAH!

:-)

New Home

Alhamdulillah, we moved into a new home last weekend.

This would be our own home soon, inshaAllah.

The bank has also approved the home loan.

Hopefully the whole purchasing process would progress faster after this.

Alhamdulillah.

Just When We Need It

It is almost always.. we get the money at the very last minute.. when, in my husband's words, I almost lost my faith in Allah's help

ALZA

We finally brought Alza home tonight. Alhamdulillah.

After a few days delay at the excise duty process, the Perodua salesman finally made call to invite me to pick up the new car.

It is kind of bittersweet to let go of my dear WaHaB. That was my first new car. It has served me well for 10 years.. although the past few months alone costed me over RM2,000 for maintenance. It definitely has passed its prime.. haha..

We are also desperately in need of a bigger car to fit at least 6 people. We have two adults, two children, one toddler, and one baby. It is safer for Umar to sit in a baby car seat than to sit on someone's lap while we travel as a family in WaHaB. Alza is almost perfect for us because it is not too big for me to drive to work in KL everyday - easy to drive and cheaper on gas. And we can afford the price too.

Alhamdulillah..

I would like take Mak around in the new car too. InshaAllah.

Clinging on to Lotus Notes

My section head hinted the other day that I should think about learning new skills, be a team player, and help with the upcoming project.

It is not bad, except that I did not apply for this job to do that. If I agree with her plan (whole- or half-heartedly), I see myself suffering doing a development work in something I am not really interested in - MS SQL (eww) and Timesheet (messy). The technology is OK and the application is understandably trying to do a lot, and I give them credit for that.. but I think I want to utilize my existing skills in something I expected to do when taking this job - EDMS in Lotus Notes.

I might lose the chance to "diversify" my skills, and to add another project in my portfolio. It may let me keep this job.

It bothered me. I started wondering if I would have to work in Sunway, leaving this nice company...

Then yesterday she said "Puteri, good news! We'll have Sofi do the Timesheet and you can do Lotus Notes." I said good.

Just before 5pm my boss asked to discuss about the plan next year. He gave me two options: MS SQL Timesheet and MS Sharepoint. I asked about supporting EDMS for other, future projects. So he mentioned the third option: EDMS support. Yes yes yes. I told him that I am most interested in this third option but not ruling out the other two. He said if I want to do EDMS, I am most welcome to do so.

YESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!

ALHAMDULILLAH.

We ended the discussion both happy.

Hopefully this is a good career decision that would be beneficial to me in the long run too. InshaAllah

Thank You Allah

Say Alhamdulillah
Thank you Allah
Thank you Allah
For my mother

Amira would say "Miya sing, Mama talk, OK?" so that she would sing and I would complete it by saying "my...?" and she would add the last word.. bike, food, soy milk, car seat, baju, bed, pillow, dolly, etc etc.

Thank you Allah for my Amira

Birthdeid Presents

I am thankful for the presents flown from halfway around the globe.

The Glorious Qur'an - Translation by Picktall
I cried.
This is the translation that I had a dream about while I was in Mecca five years ago.

Manja watch.

Tote bag - beige!

Alhamdulillah

Health

Alhamdulillah I am generally very healthy.
The babies are healthy.
Everybody in the family is in good health.

Some exercise would give me more fitness though.

Take care of our bodies.

Safety

There are a lot of bad situations out there

Natural Disasters - Typhoons, Earthquakes, Tsunami

Man-made Disasters - Wars, Fires

Crimes - Murders, Assaults and Rapes, Thefts

Accidents

Major Health Problems

Etc etc..

ALHAMDULILLAH we live in peace, safety, and health

May Allah The Almighty, The Protector, The Provider, The Sustenor, The Bestower bless us all..

Amin amin Ya Rabbil 'Alamin

School $$

We get school money every three months. Alhamdulillah. That helps pay some of our outstanding bills, as we have just started to get things in order now.

It is currently an equivalent to over one month of my salary.

That is as long as we continue to go to school and we continue to receive financial aid. So far so good.

We don't know how long they are going to last, but for now we are thankful.

ALHAMDULILLAH.

Cuddly

I have to say that yesterday was a good day despite having the Tuesday blues at work.

My husband was nice to me. We got to spend some time talking. Then he served me hot, yummy, wholesome dinner and verybody joined me for dinner again even when they had already eaten.

I washed the babies.. Amira was extra big girl today. She had no problems coordinating her breath while pouring water all over her head. Umar was happy the whole time.

I went to bed early.

In the middle of the night Amira cried. I was ready to feed her, but she just moved next to me and fell back to sleep. All she wanted was cuddling with me. And Dadda moved next to me while I had Umar wrapped in my arm. We slept tightly close together like that til the morning.

I sure woke up thankful to Allah for all the blessings.

Alhamdulillah

Growing Up FAST

I had to do a lot of things yesterday that by the time I sat down to eat my dinner I was holding back my tears. I miss my babies.

Then I grabbed sleeping Umar from his helpful big sister. While holding him, I used the computer. He slowly woke up and started to bang the laptop with his hands.

He is already copying us -- he is using the laptop now!

I let him continue doing it for awhile. He seemed to enjoy it too. I am proud of him.

I told my husband about it, and he told me another story:

Amira just learned to use the touch pad too.
Also, today she refused to sit in her high chair. So Dadda let her sit on the big chair. She did and ate there, like the big kids do.

He said
They are growing up too fast.
And I don't like that.

It's beautiful to my ears in a few ways. While I truly understand why he does not like it, I also believe that our job as parents is to let the kids learn to take care of themselves.

My babies are smart. May Allah guide us always.

ALHAMDULILLAH.

Gifts

One of the best moments to me is when I hold my babies - when I am breastfeeding them, when I am cuddling with them, or when I am just having them on my lap.

Children are indeed gifts from Allah. I am aware of that and very grateful for that. I have been wanting to have my own babies for many years. I waited 32 years to have Amira. And Umar was a very pleasant surprise.

ALHAMDULILLAH. Shukran ya Allah.

I hope I am always a grateful and thankful servant to Allah.

Now I know when Apak said "You love ALL of your children the same. When you have your own kids you'll know."

I also understand now why Mak said "If possible you want your children to always be with you. You don't want them to be apart from you."

I love my babies so much I don't know how to describe it.

Your children is your life - both your hidup and your nyawa. Parents risk their lives to save their children's. Parents cannot bear the loss of their children.. I guess that's why

Narrated Anas:

The Prophet said, “A Muslim whose three children die before the age of puberty will be granted Paradise by Allah due to his mercy for them.” {Volume 2, Book 23, Number 340 : Sahih Bukhari}

My husband said "When my (baby) daughter died, part of me died too."

And old makcik said "I have had my parents passed away, my husband passed away. But they are not the same as having my (adult) child passed away."

That's why sometimes I feel like hoping that I would die before my children do, after I have done a good job taking care of them and raising them to be good and strong Muslims, inshaAllah.

Ya Allah, grant me the wisdom and the strength to do my duty as their mother.

Amira

Alhamdulillah, Amira is 2 years old now. She's a very smart girl.. speaking in full sentences. She uses both Malay and English words sometimes, for the same thing. She absorbs like a sponge. She knows solat, zikirs, asma-ul-husna (all her version). She remembers names of people. When I come home from work, she'll say

"Momma's Home.. Momma's Home!!!" (BIG SMILE)
"Assalamualaikum!" (HAPPY FACE)
"Boobba Time!!" (DANCING)
"One for Amira, one for Umar" (READY TO EAT)

What an active baby! She sings and dances. She runs and climbs. She whispers and screams. And the best part: she cleans up (when she feels like it).

Her latest accomplishment is being able to open and close doors. The first few times she got that, she was so proud of it.. Big smile and "Look!.. Yaaayyy..." It is indeed amazing.

She loves looking at pictures and watching family movies. She recognizes the people from my side of extended family. She watches nashids and kid's video on youtube too.. and loving them!

She loves her food and drinks -- rice, chicken, roti, peanut butter, jelly, hamburger, pizza, spaghetti, beef, sayur (vitamins!), ice-cream, cookies, and medicine!

She's very pretty too. Cute baby with chubby cheeks and beautifully curled brown hair.

I LOVE YOU BABY.

Alhamdulillah

Umar

Alhamdulillah, Umar is already 6 months old now. How time flies. I know I am missing a lot of hours being with my baby boy, but this job is what we as a family needs right now.
Umar is a healthy and smart baby. I LOVE YOU, BABY! He already says "Momma" and other words. He knows to look for me when he hears my footsteps climbing up the stairs. He understands object permanence - staring at the door where I disappeared. He smiles and laughs whenever I talk to him. Amazing baby, mashaAllah. He loves being cuddled. He loves sleeping in my arms. He loves playing with Dadda.

Helpful Friend

I am reminded of my helpful friend every time I use the breast pump.

My friend Maria is indeed a blessing. She has been helpful especially since we moved back to Malaysia.

She pointed us to the most affordable Islamic private school here.
She hired my husband.
She hired me on a part-time basis. I was paid very well considering the minimal work that I had to do.
She helped us borrow some money when we really needed it.
She helped pick up the kids from school many times.
She lent me the pump. And that's why.

I guess that's her nature. That's why she was awarded "The Most Helpful Manager" once upon a time.

Alhamdulillah for thoughtful friends like Maria. May Allah return her the kindness.

My Job

It's surprising how many times I have said to myself "Oh, I love my job!"

I did not expect to enjoy my job. We need the money so I suppose this is the best thing that happen to the family right now.

Alhamdulillah, the work is fine. The workload is reasonable - I am not too busy. I don't have to stay back until night or work on weekends. I don't have to bring home my work. I have to work extra one hour everyday, but I get paid for that. Besides, I usually spend the hour doing other things.. And not much stress either. No "external customers" to please. So far that's how it is.

At work, I manage to pump twice a day. It is easy to pray - and the surau is clean and the telekungs are all clean. My boss is good. The team leader is nice. The manager is nice, too. I am capable of doing the work assigned to me. In fact, I kind of thrive on the work. I enjoy the programming. It satisfies me to see my codes work. This is after taking over three years of break from work. Alhamdulillah. The secretary is nice to me. I have friends to have lunch with. The company provides parking, and shuttle van to take the staff to the parking lots. Manja. The company paid for my eyeglasses - something I have been needing since last year. The company pays for our medical expenses too. Right when we need to pay for Umar's shots too.

And the pay is good. Alhamdulillah. Allah provides. The money is for the family, especially the kids.

This is the perfect job for us for now.

ALHAMDULILLAH.

Pacifier

I was finishing my favorite desert, the home-made smoothie, when my husband went upstairs and discovered that the baby was crying in the bedroom. When I finally went there, I saw him swinging the baby in front of the fan, a little bit surprised to see me. So he said "Sometimes he still likes to have the booba all the time, so.. " showing me the sleeping baby with a pacifier in his mouth. It was a secret until a moment ago.

 

I thought of how while taking care of the babies whose mother used to stay home with them all day, my husband get caught in trying moments. There must be moments when he feels desparate for an escape too. There must also be moments when he wishes he knew exactly what the babies want.

 

I think he is doing his best as a stay-at-home parent to the babies. They are in good hands. This becomes a pacifier, in a sense, to me too.

And I am grateful for that.

Alhamdulillah. May Allah grant him patience and wisdom in his new daily routine.

Smart Amira

Amira woke up in the middle of the night. The room was dark but she was obviously alert. She asked me "What's this, Momma?" pointing to the light on the ceiling. I looked at her, and she proudly said "A light!" with a big smile on her face. I responded "Yup. Smart girl!"

My amazing Amira. Alhamdulillah.

Friends

It was nice to meet up with all of you. I wish it was longer :-)

Watching Movies with Dadda

I came home from the store today to see this:



Tell me if I should not be thankful for the blessings.

My Husband Cooks

One of the sexiest things to me is a man cooking. I did not realize that until I after I married my husband. No wonder I love watching certain cooking shows! Cooking is a mean to nurture and nourish your loved ones. The effort one makes and the care one puts in the effort -- these are the values. When someone cooks for his family, it is a labor of love. My husband brags "I cook AMAZING food." Amazing according to him, of course. We love most of his food anyway :-)

My Babies

I am forever thankful to Allah for blessing me with the babies (two so far). ALHAMDULILLAH.
They are wonderful babies - healthy, strong, happy, smart, beautiful - perfect. MASHA'ALLAH. I hope they grow up to be good Muslims, successful in this life and hereafter, inshaAllah.

In the moments like this, when I am home with them, and they are asleep in the big bed, and I have some personal time to write this.. I am more than grateful.

I cannot find the words to express how much I love them and how happy I am to be able to stay home and take care of them... AND LOVING IT. Now that I may have to go to work soon, I am more aware of the blessing of the time with them.

May Allah help me be a great mother to them. Amin!